live like that

i've heard this song millions of times on the radio, but today it popped up on Pandora and i was struck by the challenging lyrics...

Was I love
When no one else would show up
Was I Jesus to the least of us
Was my worship more than just a song

I want to live like that
And give it all I have
So that everything I say and do
Points to You

...

Am I proof
That You are who you say You are
That grace can really change our heart
Do I live like Your love is true

-"live like that," sidewalk prophets

the big T W O

Dear J,
Wow - you are two!  I got the wake-up call when BabyCenter sent me the usual weekly update on what to expect with your development, but instead of referring to you as a toddler, they called you a preschooler!  I'm not sure if I'm ready for this!  Don't get me wrong - both your daddy and I take full delight in the ways you're growing and the things that come out of your mouth every day.  There's just this bittersweetness that comes along with growing up, realizing that every moment is fleeting.  As I hold your baby sister and remember the days when you were just as little and fragile, I am in awe of God's goodness over our family when I see how big and strong you are now.  I am reminded to savor each moment :)  Do you know how much you are loved, my son?  We are infinitely proud of you, for who you are and who you've become as you've easily stepped into the role of a loving, protective big brother in the past 5 weeks.  Happy birthday!!!

This is what you can do at 24 months (learned in the past 2 months):

• Count to 10!  Although after you count to 10, you say, 11, 14,16.. :)
• Sing songs, with some of the key words and general tune: Happy Birthday, Rooba Roo (from Uncle Freddy & Esther emo's wedding video), Hold Me (Jamie Grace), 10,000 Reasons (Matt Redman), I Gave Up (Mark Schultz).  You are insistent on having the radio on in the car! :)  That's my boy...
• Recognize and name the colors of the rainbow.  You can point and read the last page of "Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What do You See?" (Eric Carle) that has all the animals and their colors.
• Do a somersault. (Really good gymnast form!)
• Blow out candles
• Draw a straight line on a paper if I model it for you first.  Generally, though, you prefer circles.
• Play Hide-and-Seek by hiding under something and saying, "Jonathan go?" and laughing wildly when we find you.
• Love your sister, who is now here!  You kiss her a million times a day, bring toys to her while saying, "Here you go..."
• Bargain with us.  When we tell you that you only get one of something, you smile, hold up your fingers and say, "Three!  Four!!!"

The following lists are by no means comprehensive...it's almost impossible to record everything, since you have been learning so fast and repeat most things you hear.  But for the sake of continuity and list-making... :)

Words you now say (learned in the past 2 months):
Bless you, Abigail
Abby crying
Abby sad
Abby laughing
Abby smiling
(noticing a trend, here?)  :)  

Hi Oppa! (Korean for "big brother" to a girl. Except you like to call Abby "oppa" instead)
Come here!
Over there
What's that sound?  (Sounds like "what dat dound?")
Who's that? ("who dat?"...usually said right after someone leaves or the phone rings)  :)
Thank you  ("dank yonk")
You're welcome ("welcome")
Oh my goodness!
Raining stopped
JeeJee  (Korean for "dirty")
Peanut butter
Shower
Esther
Popsicle ("poh-cuh-cull")
Gummy
Pizza
Cheese
Good? (your prompt for us to ask you if what you're eating tastes good.  You think it's hilarious to answer "No!" as you chomp away on it.)
Itchy
High five
Bump
Mole
Upstairs
Candle
Battery
See ("I wanna see")
Watch video
Read book
Bear poohpooh (what you call Winnie the Pooh)
Where are you?
Where is it? ("where zee zeet?")
Ladybug
Bumblebee
There you are!
Gossie
Gertie
Peedie
Ollie
Dark
The End! (A must while closing any book you read)
Elephant
Giraffe
Penguin
Camel
Hippo
Rhino
Kangaroo
Dolphin
Fly
Booster seat
High chair
Change diaper

Signs you now know (new ones learned in the past 2 months in italics):

• More
• Please
• All done
• Milk
• Please give it to me (in Korean)
• Thank you (sort of)
• Help (your version)
• Outside (a sign you made up yourself to consistently mean "go outside")
• School
• Refrigerator (your version)
• Table
• Play (your version)
• Drink
• Eat
• Library
• Church
• Playground

Memorable Conversations:
Recently we read this book called Wild Animals, and we stopped and talked about how giraffes eat leaves from trees.  From that point on, every time we read the book again, you always stop at the picture of a giraffe eating and point and ask, "What's that?"  I turn the question back to you, and you answer, "Trees."  So then I ask, "Do you eat trees?"  And you smile and say, "No..."  When I ask you, "What do you eat?" you answer with either "Oranges." or "Pizza."

The day before you turned 2, I told you that you were one, but tomorrow you would be two.  When I asked you throughout the day, you remembered to say "1" for how old you were, and "2" for how old you were going to be tomorrow.  The next morning, we exclaimed "Happy birthday!!!" and when I asked you how old you were, you thought for a while and then said,"Two!"

dear j...

Dear J,

Tomorrow is your little sister's due date!  So much about her birth has me in suspense - besides the normal questions like, What will she look like?  What kind of personality will she have? etc., there are so many questions about how you two will get along.

Well, as your daddy and I have been praying, we hope that you two will be best buddies.  We're praying against jealousy and comparisons, and for an awesome friendship to sprout.  We pray that you'll look out for one another, teach one another, and love well.

It's been really sweet to see you try to grasp the concept of the sister you have yet to meet.  You talk to her, try to show her your toys and videos, give her drinks and food (through my belly button), and find comfort in hugging her and giving her kisses.  You've completely relinquished your nursery to her, calling it "Abby's room" and seem to understand the concepts of certain new things (like the baby swing Daddy just assembled) being "Abby's."

Tonight you practiced singing "Happy Birthday" before you blew out our scented candle, and when Daddy asked "Who do you want to sing to?" you answered, "Abby!"  And then I started having a couple contractions tonight.  We'll see when her Birth day turns out to be!

Part of me feel so sad to think that you are nearly two and thus not a baby anymore (though in my heart, you'll always be my baby boy).  Yesterday, you came down with a stomach bug that extended into today.  You were throwing up for the first time ever (well, since you passed that spitting up phase) and I could tell it really weirded you out and tired you out, especially since you couldn't keep anything down all day.  It made Daddy and me so sad to see you so sick and lethargic...yet at the same time, it brought back so many sweet memories of the days not-so-long-ago when you were an infant and would sleep and lie in our arms in the same peaceful way.  Even as you were sick this morning and spent the day resting and recovering, I was thankful for this little bit of extra time spent with snuggling with you...your last few days as an only child.

Even though both Daddy and I are middle children, I hope to be considerate of changes that come (into your life) with welcoming a new member to our family.  I am still learning so much as a parent...and I pray that God will show me the best way to care for your needs as you adjust to your role as a big brother.  No matter what, remember that we love you so much!  We are so proud to be your parents.

Love,
Mommy

twenty-two!

J, where is time going?  I'm sort of in denial that you will be turning two in just two months!  Your daddy recently gave a message about how the Father delights in us, and he used a lot of examples from the way we delight in you...and it's true.  We're in awe over the rapid pace you learn, the things you say, and the way you think.  We love your generous heart that is so willing to share even the things most precious to you.  It's how you love others, and it's pretty special.
Your baby sister is due to arrive any day now (due date is in about 10 days!) and we've been praying a lot for your smooth transition into big-brotherhood.  In the meantime, though, we are just enjoying this extra time with you, our forever-first-baby. :)  I love you!!!


This is what you can do at 22 months (learned in the past 2 months):

• Count - You used to count like this:  3, 4, 6!  Then after Easter, you started counting like this:  1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7!  Now it's like 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 11...11...11...
• Recognize some numbers and letters - you are especially good at 1, 2, 3, 4 and A, O, X.  Although you still think the X's on your crib sheets are airplanes :)
• Sleep in a big boy bed.  You're kind of spoiled because you get a queen-sized bed!  We were going to wait until you were potty-trained to move you out of the crib, but it worked out well that you started sleeping really well in the bed in your new room, since your little sister is coming very very soon!
• Request songs:  The Wheels on the Bus ("Bus"!), Happy Birthday to You, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, ABC song, I Just Wanna Be a Sheep, Head Shoulders Knees & Toes, The Itsy Bitsy Spider  and Milk.
• You also remember and request our silly, made-up verses to The Wheels on the Bus: horse, hippo, guitar, drum, piano, gummy (goes "yum, yum, yum"), Jonathan (goes "Appa!"), Appa (goes "Hey buddy!") and Umma (goes "No, no, no...")...
• (Sometimes) Name the color of things we see.  You usually do this correctly with orange, blue, green, black, brown, and white.  Yellow used to be really hard for you to say, but now you're really good at identifying things that are yellow!
• Jump off the fireplace ledge.  Jump off the nursing stool in your room.  Jump on the bed & couch.
• Take apart and put together the Russian nesting dolls (which I just learned are called Matryoshka dolls).  This is a big improvement from trying to eat them, which is why we've had to confiscate them until now :)
• Play with rocks....they are your latest obsession.  You love pebbles and stones of every kind and it is necessary for you to stop, examine and pick up every one you see.  (It all started when you played in the rock pits at Mt. Aetna during the spring conference)
• Draw with crayons, pens, and whatever you can get your hands on.  This interest in drawing has definitely grown in the past few months.  You love drawing circles and ovals :)  You are usually very good about drawing only on the paper we give you, but recently you got ahold of a pen on my nightstand and decorated my bedroom wall, lamp, and the corner of my sheets with gel ink.
• Navigate the iPad with extreme ease.  You even know how to put the Youtube videos on full screen and how to "x" out of the pop-up ads in your free apps.
• Re-enact scenes from your favorite Baby Einstein videos...such as this one with the dragon, and especially the one with the hippos and elephant (sorry for poor video quality - it was the only clip I could find...).  You like for us to pretend we're the hippos so you can be the disruptive elephant :)
• Love your sister, who is still in utero.  You kiss and hug my bare belly, calling her by name, and offer her all your food and sippy cups.  You also tell her to sit with you and show her your toys.  It's super endearing!  We pray it's the beginning of a lifelong friendship between you two!

The following lists are by no means comprehensive...it's almost impossible to record everything, since you have been learning so fast and repeat most things you hear.  But for the sake of continuity and list-making... :)

Words you now say (learned in the past 2 months):
Hold this
Open please
Black car
Garbage truck
Mail truck
BIIIIIIG truck
Big school bus
City bus
Gomo's bus
One more bus
Mool down  (when the water is drained from tub)
Oatmeal (your go-to answer when we ask what you want to eat)
Bagel
Dunk!
Chair
Table
Outside
Inside
Home
Walk  (as in, "Let me down so I can walk!")
Doorbell
Bubbles
Tent
Halmoni

Abby/Abigail
Dream emo - Dream
Bekah emo - Rebekah K.
Micah
MM - M&M
Only one  (the number of M&Ms you get at a time)
One more time
Legos  (you love to build garbage trucks and dump trucks)
Girl
Boy
Golf
Blocks
Brush
Gel  (you seem to like when I style your hair and sometimes even request it!)
Toothbrush
Toothpaste (you love the stuff like candy)

Eyebrow
_______'s room  (you now understand that your old nursery is now Abby's room)
Ouch
"Ai-yah" - Korean for "ouch"
Ah-puh - Korean for "it hurts"
bboh-bboh - Korean for "kiss"

Bless you  (you say this after you sneeze)
(name) go?  (to mean "Where did  (name) go?")
"What the?" (picked it up too quickly from hanging out with James samchun!)


Words you've made up to consistently mean something else:
Ha-buh-jee - Haraboji (Grandpa in Korean)
More ha-buh-jee - Grandpa Lee
More halmoni - Grandma Lee
Ha-buh-jee van - Haraboji's van
Es-emo - Esther emo
Uh-Fred/Joe/Dan - Uncle Fred/Joe/Dan...although sometimes you get lazy and call Uncle Freddy "ohbuddy"
Uh-Kiss - Uncle Chris
Jay-bock- Jacob
Samchun - Caleb samchun
Icy dung - Isaac hyung (hehe.)  ("hyung"= big brother in Korean)
Gasses - glasses/sunglasses
Bank-it - blanket
Uh-down - mixture between Korean and English for "sit down"
Dar-ee - sorry
Dankoo- Thank you
Bi-cuhcul - bicycle
Kip - clip (my hair clip, which you love to put in your own hair)
Dummerdoll - somersault (which you recently mastered on your own!)

Memorable Conversations:

When I ask you if you slept well, you always answer yes.  If I ask you if you dreamed, the answer again is yes.  When I ask you what you dreamed about, the answers vary, but mostly follow this format:
"Balloon. Bella noona, Haraboji....(and sometimes others, like Nooga hyung. Joy noona)

If I ask you how old you are, you hold up your pointer finger and say, "1!"  When I ask how old Bella noona is, you answer "3!" and hold up a crumpled hand (in an attempt to show just 3 fingers)

If I ask you, "What do you do at the library?" You answer, "Book, bubbles, song, clap, dance...(and sometimes "Bubbles.  Big bubbles. More bubbles."  Can you guess what your favorite part of Story Time is?)

You recently learned to answer when I ask you, "J, do you love Umma?"   "Yes."  "How much?"  "SOOO much!"  This makes my heart swell :)

generosity.

Today was my last official day of teaching...for who knows how long?
It was truly a bittersweet day, as I was filled with mixed emotions - the happiness that comes with the end of the year (even sweeter when it's 3 weeks early!), sadness to be bidding farewell to a really great class, awesome co-teacher, and the school that I've been calling mine for the past seven years.  Plus, just general exhaustion from being 8 months pregnant and surviving on only a few hours of sleep the past few days, as I've rushed to complete my final formal observation lesson plan and long-term sub plans into the wee hours of the morning.

Yesterday I sent home a letter to parents to let them know about my early leave and the substitute teacher's name.  I didn't want the parents to be taken by surprise with the substitute starting tomorrow morning.  What I didn't expect was to be overwhelmed with kindness from some of the parents after school today.  They came to pick up their child bearing sweet gifts for my baby girl.  I was so humbled by their thoughtfulness and generosity.  Most of my students come from difficult financial backgrounds - in fact, one of the mothers amazed me, since I know she works nights as a custodian...yet she so lavishly gave.

Last week was teacher appreciation week and it seems like this was the first time in my seven years of teaching that it was actually celebrated or recognized (outside of my principal sticking little tokens of appreciation in the staff mailboxes).  I know that in other counties and school districts, the PTA goes all out in showing appreciation to the teachers, but we know not to expect too much in our school.  However, on Friday last week, my principal called all staff who could stay after school to the cafeteria and there was a huge buffet set up...all donations from the parents of our school who cooked or purchased food to say thank you to the teachers.  My principal said that in the ten years of our school's existence, this is the first time that anything like this has ever been organized by the parents.

These two examples were extremely humbling because I was on the receiving end of both.  It almost made me cry to think of the beautiful hearts behind these generous gestures.  It wasn't about the yummy food or the cute girly outfits...it was the heart behind each act.

This year's key verse for me is all about generosity and I feel God reminding me over and over again how beautiful real generosity is to Him.  I want to love like that...

easter

Happy Easter!

Now that I'm a mom, I realize that I've been thinking a lot more about the things we do around each holiday.  Holidays are great, and who doesn't love to celebrate...but I want to be very intentional about the things we do and be able to explain to my children why we do them.  In the blogging world (esp. craft/diy/mommy blogs), it's easy to get swallowed up by holidays and place the emphasis on the cute crafts, decor, clothing, photo shoots, and food that is associated with each.

Don't get me wrong - I love these things, too - but I want to make sure that J and Abby know why we do what we do...and hear it from me (and Mr. A) from the beginning.

This morning we were reading from J's new children's Bible (which I love).  Here is an excerpt from what we read:

They nailed Jesus to the cross.  "Father, forgive them," Jesus gasped. "They don't understand what they're doing."
"You say you've come to rescue us!" people shouted. "But you can't even rescue yourself!"
But they were wrong.  Jesus could have rescued himself. A legion of angels would have flown to his side - if he'd called.
"If you were really the Son of God, you could just climb down off that cross!" they said.
And of course they were right.  Jesus could have just climbed down.  Actually, he could have just said a word and made it all stop.  Like when he healed that little girl.  And stilled the storm.  And fed 5,000 people.
But Jesus stayed.
You see, they didn't understand.  It wasn't the nails that kept Jesus there.  It was love.  (v.304)

-------

Jesus had a real body but this body was better.  It had come through death and couldn't get sick or be killed again.  This body would live forever.  Jesus had come back with a brand new body.
Not only were sad things coming untrue, the friends realized, they were becoming new again.  Was God going to make everything new?
Jesus said, "I am the Savior and the Rescuer of the world."  And they knew, because he couldn't stay dead, because Jesus had come alive again, that somehow everything would be all right.  (v.321)


-------


My heart has been singing this song the past couple weeks.


So much love.  So much hope - and victory!  That is what Easter is all about.

Liebster cont'd

Today is Installment 2 (of 2) of the Liebster posts. :)

11 Questions to Answer:  (as asked by Holly)

Yum.

1. If you could eat any breakfast food right now, what would it be?  Please be very descriptive.  I love breakfast food and want to drool all over your descriptions.
Normally I love breakfast foods of all kinds, but this pregnancy, I have been only wanting to eat cereal and bagels!  So - a big bowl of Honey Graham Oh's (a lesser known but super delish cereal) or a 12 grain NY bagel with veggie cream cheese.  Mmm.  Make that with a side of watermelon and honey dew, a tall glass of pulpy orange juice and a steaming mug of hazelnut (decaf) coffee and I will be a happy girl.

2. What book is closest to where you’re sitting, right this very minute?
The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. It's one of my favorites, but I haven't read it since my study abroad trip to Spain in early 2002 and figured it was about time for a re-read.  This woman's life amazes me.

3. Think about something you really want to do (you don’t have to share what it is).  What’s holding you back?
Money?  Maybe also the fear of failure and an uncertainty of whether it'll really be worth the time/heart I invest in it.
So to explain, I've been thinking a lot about staying home to raise J and Abby, and it's a big leap.  In the back of my mind, I've been considering different ways to provide extra income (things I've been toying with for the past couple of years, which include opening an Etsy shop, selling my own worksheets on TeachersPayTeachers.com, and getting more into blogging).   Just little ideas right now, but need to wait and see...

4. Which holiday has the traditions that you enjoy the most? 
It's a tie between Thanksgiving and Christmas.  In our church, we try to make lists each Thanksgiving of the specific things we are thankful for.  These are the two holidays that are always spent with family every year, and I love that.
For our youth group, we started a new tradition last year for celebrating Christmas.  We used to do the tradition gift exchange (bring a $10-15 gift and play the gift swap game), but found that it sometimes created hurt feelings and didn't really drive home the point of giving that we were trying to teach.  So instead, we started having the students bring in the cash (instead of a gift) and splitting up the group into teams to play various games.  The winning team got to take the total amount of collected money and decide how to spend it on gifts for people in need via websites like World Vision or Gospel for Asia.I love traditions and can't wait to start making them for our kids :)

5. Fill in the blanks: I would do twice as much (insert household task/chore), in exchange for never having to (insert another household task/chore) EVER AGAIN.
Easy question :)  I would definitely do twice as many dishes (and this is hand-washing!) if I never have to wash floors EVER AGAIN.  Hands down.  (PS - if you come over, don't inspect my floors too carefully).  haha.

6. Do you like how common your name is?  [ie, "Sarah"s, do you like sharing your name with half the world?  "Shelande"s, do you like having such a unique name?]
I 've always liked the name "Sarah," even though it's an especially popular name at my church (so much so that when I hear people say "Sarah!" at church I don't turn around right away because it's often meant for another Sarah.  :)  I guess I'm glad I don't have any problems with other people's pronunciation of my name, though I often have to correct spelling.

7. When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you “grew up”?
Oooh, I answered this one already! :)  See #10 on this post.

8.  Do you have as much trouble with the “Insert Numbered List” function as I do?  It always – ALWAYS – screws up my formatting.  I’ve resigned myself to actually typing the numbers.
YES.  It drives me crazy.  So does the strange/inconsistent font/formatting on Blogger.  :(

9. What are you using to replace/instead of Google Reader? 
Blogger.  Even though its formatting is cuckoo, I am glad it's not leaving me.

10. What smell is nostalgic to you?
Mango body butter from The Body Shop.  One whiff and I'm immediately transported to Yanji, China, where I spent two years after graduating from college.  It has very frigid and long winters, so I used the mango body butter to combat dry, winter skin!

11. Self-Serving Question: What would you like to read more of on this blog?
I love reading about everyday life in Singapore at Run With Holly.  I feel like I'm getting a free tour of the country without leaving my bedroom :)

Blogs I nominate:
*This is tough because most of the blogs I read don't have access to my blog, and a lot of other blogs I read are personal blogs and aren't necessarily updated regularly (like mine, haha).  In other words, even if I don't nominate you, please feel free to participate! :)

1.  Crystal at Shine.  I love her sweet honesty and her heart for building community, encouragement (especially for moms), and passion about compassion.  And the cute toddler pix are a great bonus :)

2.  Grace at A Journey Through Life.  I've seen her grow up (literally across the street) but love reading about her spiritual growth from her own eyes.  She is also one of the best photographers I know personally, and has a knack for capturing beauty in unique ways through her photos.


Questions for You:

1.  It's a rainy Saturday and all you want to do is curl up with some hot chocolate and watch a movie.  What is your go-to movie?

2.  What is your earliest childhood memory?

3.  What do you love about your family?

4.  If you could become fluent in one language today, which would you choose and why?

5.  What is your biggest pet peeve?

6.  Cartoon animals are often cuter than the real deal.  What is your favorite cartoon animal?  (Doesn't have to be a cartoon character...could be simply "cartoon hippos")

7.  What is your favorite group game? (I love games and am constantly on the prowl for new ones!)

8.  Outside of your family, who has had the greatest influence on shaping the person you are today?    

9.  What is something you are really, really good at and could teach a class on?  (It could be super random/simple, like making a killer PB&J sandwich) 

10.  How did you learn to tie your shoelaces - making 2 bunny ears, OR a tree that a bunny runs around and jumps into the hole?  (Shoe-tying technique is an area of dispute between Mr. A and me)  :)    

11.  Tell me a memory you have about kindergarten or first grade!  (I'm always curious since I teach this age group and always wonder what people tend to remember about these days)

Whew!  Long post.  I'm not used to this :)